Wednesday, November 30, 2011

I know this is an emotional time for me, but damn.

I've been home for like two hours, and I've been depressed for like two hours.  Coincidence?  You decide.


Have you ever felt like everything in the world was beating down on you at once?  And you know there's nothing you can do to make it better.  I feel like I've been kicked in the teeth and punched in the head just by life.  I feel like everyone and everything in the world is setting out to pick us clean.

I've been really close to tears like eight times in the past couple of hours.  I had one crying fit in my bedroom.

I just want everything to not suck anymore.  I don't want to live this life anymore.


Sometimes I just want to cut off all my hair, assume some fake identity, and move across the country and not let anyone know I was leaving.


I'm sad and angry.  And I just want to scream.



REALLLLLLY LOUDLY.




Seriously.


Nothing has worked out the way I planned for like the past decade.  I know, that's life.  I'm not trying to whine... I just... I need to vent.  Because no one wants to listen to me.

And it's my blog, so I can be as annoying as I want.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Black Friday (Or, What the Fuck Was I Thinking???)

So, I realize my blog has been a bit neglected.  Sorry... yeah, I'm a big loser.  Since the beginning of November, I've been writing a freaking book for crying out loud (for NaNoWriMo), but I don't have any excuses for before that.  But there you go.

Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I have a harrowing tale.

I went Black Friday Shopping.  Well, since Black Friday has become kind of like Christmas (which slops all the way over until just before Halloween), it now slops over onto the afternoon/evening of Thanksgiving.  I went to Wal-Mart (which is not my favorite store to begin with) on Thursday night to be a part of the sales insanity that was to start at 10 o'clock.

We got there at 9:15 or so.  I wanted to go a little earlier because I knew it would be super crowded, but my mother has this ridiculous idea that people ought to spend holidays with their family and not leave a family dinner in the search for a deal... yadda yadda.  Well, we got to this place and it was a freaking mad house.  We went inside and grabbed a basket.  My mom headed to the restroom and as I was walking I saw people in the freaking checkout lines  (well before 10:00) with the stuff I was there to buy!  I freaked.  So I had to try and navigate the basket by myself through this insane crowd.

I got around to the sewing machines (which was the main thing I was dying to get), plopped one down in my cart, and tried to head back to the front part of the store to find my mom.  But my gawd, the place seemed even more crowded going back the other way.  I tried to stay near the front of the store so I could find my mother, but the crowd was moving as such as solid block that I had to stick with traffic.  At that point I just accepted that I wouldn't be seeing my mother again... I figured that, like me, I was a Black Friday orphan.

I did eventually meet back up with her.  And together we found the small appliance section.  We were after a Black and Decker blender and coffee pot, both on sale for $9 and change.  The small appliance section was packed so tight I "accidentally" shouted, "it's like Woodstock in here!"  I left my mom in control of the basket and had to fight through the crowd myself.  I was able to grab one of the coffee pots (which was one of the few remaining in a small stack).  The blenders, however, seemed to be gone.  This might have had something to do with the smug assholes with 5 of them in their carts, but whatever.  We actually ended up getting another (slightly inferior) blender for a couple dollars more, but hey, we needed a blender.

So we went to the register (which was a ridiculously long trip because of the damn crowds), and waited behind several people that seemed to be confused about how to pay for the purchases and how to get a Wal-Mart card... all kinds of crap like that.

But we finally got through there, walked back to the Lowe's parking lot (because the Wal-Mart one was completely jam packed), and got the hell out of there.  Overall, we got back in the car about an hour and a half after we had originally pulled into the parking lot.  It was the longest hour and a half of my life.

But for $78 , we got a sewing machine, blender, and coffee pot... all things that we needed.  So I can't complain.  Much.