colon three

I had two good days in a row.  And not just good by my standards... good in general.  Yesterday I had soup and went to see Guardians of the Galaxy (and really enjoyed it) and today I went to the comic book store and came home and read some comics and watched Parks and Rec.  And I've been in a pretty good mood.
But like... this is weird.  I discovered even when I'm in a good mood I'm not really in a good mood?  I don't know how to describe it, but like basically when I start feeling happy there's unhappy under the surface so I work harder to keep happy overpowering unhappy but end up tired because it takes a lot of energy to act like I'm feeling better than I am.  I don't even know.

But that's like exactly what I don't want to dwell on right now.  Because I am doing alright.  These past couple of days have been good and I'm thankful for that.  Especially given that the day before yesterday was really bad and I'm not interested in going back.  (Long story that I've lost most of the details of anyways.)

SO yeah.  Good days.  And like... I don't know.  I'm really hoping I keep having good days.  Can you imagine?  What if next time I posted to this blog I was just like, "Best.  Week.  Ever!"  That would be amazing.

And I don't know if anyone is reading this blog (sometimes I really, really hope not) but if you are, thanks for being there.