I am so tired of not being okay.  Like, it's honestly exhausting.  I'm tired of it, and the people around me are tired of it... and me.  Maybe I need new people... but how, with social anxiety, could i hope to meet them, lol.  I'm feeling so sorry for myself right now and it's in no way attractive, but there we are.  I'm trying to pull myself up by my bootstraps or however the saying goes but I just... would rather... idk, die.