So, I know when you were all eagerly watching the royal wedding you were thinking to yourself, "yes, that's fine, Katie Couric, but what does Bre think about all of this????" Well, I intend to tell you.
I'll start by saying that I had not planned to watch the wedding. It's not that I have anything against William or Kate or Britain or anything... I just, I dunno. I'm quite single, so weddings depress me. Being a single girl with dozens of friends who are married, engaged, heavily involved, parents, or some combination of those things and watching a wedding (in person or on television) is like going to a Holocaust memorial... even though what you're seeing doesn't directly affect you, you're just not going to get out without being heavily depressed.
But for the last two days, my mom has watched the Bio channel on and off, and they've shown about a thousand wedding specials. And I began to get curious about the dress and the hats and what not. And, you know, I do enjoy a romance... and I adore princesses. Plus, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't completely taken with Catherine Middleton... she seems so lovely.
So we decided to DVR it. We watched it Friday afternoon... and I was amused. At times. Okay, I'll start with the important thing. Kate looked lovely. Her hair was half up and half down (which is what I expected) and she had these beautiful new earrings which were apparently a gift from her parents. She was wearing a lovely, delicate, elegant, and classy tiara that was a gift to the Queen on her 18th birthday. I would have chosen a larger tiara, but the one she wore was rather fitting for her, and it looked appropriate with her whole ensemble. And the dress? Perfection. Now, a lot of people have commented that it was too simple, but that's kinda her style. I may be biased, because it's similar to the dress I always imagine myself wearing at my fantasy wedding (if ever I have one), but it was wonderful. Lace sleeves for the win.
And William was a sight as well. I'm glad he wore a military uniform instead of a morning suit (for, as Lydia Bennett would say, "A man looks nothing without regimentals!"). He chose his red Irish uniform, which was perfect because red is my favorite color, and yes, the groom should have a bit of flash about him on the big day, too. But the thing that stood out the most was hair, or lack there of. He's 28, and he's balder than his father! I have to say, he got married just in time... he's got so little hair, and he's starting to get a bit horsey in the face (just a bit... he's used to be rather handsome, and he's still rather cute).
Pippa looked amazing. And I know it's English custom for the maid of honor to match the bride (i.e. white dress), but I would not want my sister looking amazing in a white dress on my big day. (Furthermore, I'd have anyone who dared come in white forcibly ejected... but that's just me.) Harry looked quite nice as well. He still seems to have enough hair, and his uniform really went well with his coloring.
As for the guests, I was happy to see Posh and Becks. He looked great... she looked pretty good, but the hat was ish. I was really delighted to see Sir Elton John. I love him. He's getting so pudgy nowadays that he sort of waddles, and his suit made him look like the Penguin. And I've never in my life seen anything like the hats on the Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie. Beatrice's defied gravity. Eugenie's has an odd sort of charm, though.
All that church crap was as to be expected... dull. I'm still puzzled by his choosing not to wear a ring (custom or no, my husband is gonna have a ring).
That kiss on the balcony was wonderful. Maybe next time they're in public together, he'll shake her hand.
So, now that we're all thoroughly up to speed on what happened, here's what I was hoping would happen, for it would have made for great TV:
- I wanted Queen Elizabeth to do something dramatic and attention seeking. Smack Kate or something.
- I wanted them to embrace during that kiss on the balcony. And I wanted him to grope her ass just a little, and her to giggle and playfully shove him.
- I wanted Harry to say something saucy to Pippa, causing her to giggle loudly in the church.
- When the princes were arriving, I wanted some militant or something to take a shot at William. Harry would cry out either "That's my brother!" or "God save the future king!" and dive in front of him, taking the bullet. William would fall to his knees, weeping for his brother. Then, Harry would lift his shirt, revealing a bullet proof vest he'd thought to wear in case of such an instance. The guards would capture the would-be assassin and beat him to a pulp on live TV.
And at this point, I'm still hoping to see pictures from that dinner and dance that Charles threw for the new couple. I'm dying to see them dancing to "Gold Digger" or "Single Ladies." I want to see some nightclub style moves... and I'm hoping she's lifting her dress a bit. And my wish of all wishes, is to see William, the future king, raise the roof. What more could I ask for?
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